Brunch and Cake: the worst restaurant in Barcelona?

On Passeig de Joan de Borbó, in Barceloneta, you can see the line.

It’s there every morning: the line for Brunch and Cake.

While other restaurants stand empty in the mornings, Brunch and Cake has a loyal crowd of tourists and tourists alike, all waiting patiently to sit at a table in the warm Mediterranean sun.

I’d been warned about the place by people who’d been.

“The food’s not good, but it’s highly instagrammable.”

So I was suspicious, but Morena wanted to go, and we went. The line was short that day, and we got in without much problem.

And the food at Brunch and Cake is indeed instagrammable. Also – just as important – it’s described using full sentences.

The food at Bruch and Cake in Barcelona

No “coffee and toast” here.

Diners must strap themselves in for freshly sliced 94-grain rustic sourdough, coated in fair-trade avocado puree and drizzled with the tears of grass-fed Antarctic salmon.

Just kidding.

But Morena did get a black corn waffle with lobster foam.

Verdict: mostly sugar, with a drizzling of bullshit.

I got the least carby-sounding thing on the menu, which was basically the same. Lots of grains and sugar, one egg. Made for photos, not for actual human consumption.

brunch and cake barcelona
Sunrise at the beach in Barceloneta.

Other diners were eating coconut bowls full of chia seeds or tapioca balls or açai or whatever it is people eat these days.

Morena’s comment: “If they went to my town and saw someone eating out of a coconut bowl, their little first-world hearts would break at the poverty of the whole situation.”

Indeed… but the hipster’s search for authenticity knows no bounds.

After a couple of coffees and a valiant attempt to eat my breakfast, I head to the loo.

Inside, dozens of identically dressed girls are happily spending their parents’ money. Straightironed hair, tight white pants, platform birkenstocks, little round glasses.

Must be the look this year.

And no amount of processed carbs is enough to satiate them.

Next time, I’ll skip the Brunch and Cake experience and just get a coffee at Buenas Migas, right down the way.

What’s your least favorite restaurant in Barcelona?

Let me know, right here in the comments!

Yours,

Mr Chorizo.

P.S. There are few things I dislike more than gushing restaurant reviews full of exclamation points and useless adjectives. But if you want to be a real travel writer, you should probably write a few of them. Also, check out my tips for becoming Instafamous in my article on how to be an influencer. Thank me later.

P.P.S. If you want to eat actual good food, I also have an article about my favorite restaurants in Barceloneta. Bon profit!

P.P.P.S. I’ve got a new (and slightly related) article about a day in the life of a vegan entrepreneur. We all know one of them, at this point. Warning: it’s got sarcasm.

Daniel
 

How did I end up in Madrid? Why am I still here 12 years later? Excellent questions. With no good answer... Anyway, at some point I became a blogger, bestselling author and contributor to Lonely Planet. So there's that. Drop me a line, I'm happy to hear from you.

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