The lonely troll

I’ve been blogging for about 5 years at this point, and in all that time, I’ve received mostly positive, intelligent comments. I’m really happy about that, in fact, because it was my impression that the internet was supposed to be full of trolls. And, well, I’m sure it is. They just hadn’t found me.

There was one comment I was expecting to receive some day, on Mr Daniel’s educational website–the inevitable “Your Spanish sucks and you’re just another ignorant guiri” comment.

troll-face-1280x720

Troll face from factspy.net

Finally! This morning I got it. Here you go, and thanks for trolling:

Estimado Daniel,

Puntúas bien en español, sin embargo, cometes muchos fallos de concordancia y orden de las palabras en las frases… ¿Y dices que vives en Madrid? Vaya… ¡Qué bonito!, como siempre, los anglófonos intentando que otros aprendan muy bien su idioma,… “como un nativo dices”, mientras que tú, profesor, te quedas tan “pancho” machacando el español.

Estamos bonitos… Predica con el ejemplo, anda. Hay un montón de webs que enseñan español y también puedes hacer un plan semanal para mejorarlo… Ya sabes, ver películas, leer el periódico, etc. Otra cosa, en mis viajes por Europa y América, siempre me ha sorprendido que los peores que hablan español son siempre los angloparlantes… ¿por qué será que a ustedes les cuesta más aprender cualquier otra lengua que no sea la materna? Eso también tendrían que investigarlo, ¿no crees?

Es fácil criticar al que tienes al lado.

Pepa.

Thanks Pepa! You apparently have entirely missed the point, that I’m writing in order to help people achieve their goals and live better lives, and not to criticize anyone. English is a pretty necessary tool for a lot of people, in case you haven’t got the memo about that.

Anyway, now I can move on with my life. It has been confirmed: My Spanish sucks, and I’m just another ignorant guiri.

I’ve actually written a bit about this topic. How about some American Ignorance? Or maybe try this one: Are Europeans more civilized than Americans?

Well, hater’s gon’ hate. Got anything to say about how I’m a jerk and need to learn how language works? Leave me a comment!

Yours,

Mr Chorizo.

P.S. Actually, most of the comments I receive from people who want to correct my Spanish are very polite and apologetic. Along the lines of Señor Daniel, I’m very sorry to be forced to write you this email, because as a professor you have nothing but my deepest respect, but there’s a certain mistake you’ve made at least 7 dozen times. Would you be so kind as to revise your use of the word… etc etc etc. It’s cute, and I always try to send them a “thank you.” Obviously, I make mistakes, and I’m happy to have them corrected. I’m only human!

 

Daniel
 

How did I end up in Madrid? Why am I still here 12 years later? Excellent questions. With no good answer... Anyway, at some point I became a blogger, bestselling author and contributor to Lonely Planet. So there's that. Drop me a line, I'm happy to hear from you.

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